This is it…the moment you have all been waiting for (or maybe I’m just being narcissistic in my assumption of your intrigue with my life and story…hmmm). In any case…this weekend, we told our parents about their first grandchild. Let the awesomeness and hilarity ensue.
We traveled to Pittsburgh this weekend for Easter to visit with Ace’s parents and fill them and his sister and brother-in-law in on the news that a new little life was budding in the family. We also decided to travel to my parents in Philly to tell them, my grandma, sister and her girlfriend about our newest upcoming addition. LB (Little Babe) will be the first niece/nephew for our siblings and the first grandchild for both sets of parents, so it was a pretty big announcement…especially since we are both “tragically thirty” and both sets of parents had pretty much completely given up on our reproductive capabilities and desires. Go figure.
Now, we are both fairly close with our respective families, so keeping this bombshell a secret from them for three months was HORRENDOUSLY difficult. The worse part of all of it was that after we first found out, we went home to attend his sister’s wedding and had to keep it quiet the whole time, despite my incessant puking and sleeping schedule.
So we finally arrive at his parents after 10 hours of driving, and we decide we are all going to meet at Red Robin (awesome gluten free burgers!) for dinner. Okay…so this is going to be a public reveal.
We had planned ahead of time, since it was Easter, to do one of those cheesy overly planned reveals, but we wanted to make it a little difficult to guess. We didn’t want it to be like, here open a box with a baby thing in it that will give it away immediately, so we went the Peep route. Yes, that’s right. Easter Peeps. You know, those horrible, colorful, semi-marshmallow things dipped in the world’s most bitter tasting sugar? Yeah…
So we bought huge plastic Easter eggs, placed a pink or blue Peep in each egg with Easter grass,and wrote our due date on the bottom of the Peep with a Sharpie. Classy. We planned on giving each person an egg and telling them to open them at the same time.
We were nervous as all heck.
We sat down at the table and kept shooting each other these ridiculous glances as if to say “should we do it now? You do it! No, you do it!” We are children.
Finally we work up the courage to say something and we hand each person an egg. We explain the rules and we say go.
Ace’s mom, dad and sister look at the Peeps with confused faces for what seems like eternity. Mom makes a comment about how cute it is. Dad laughs. Sister is the ONLY one that looks at the bottom of the Peep and discovers the date. After about 2 minutes, mom says “Is it your wedding date? Did you change it? Did you move it up?” We shake our heads no. 5 minutes later, everyone is still confused and then it happens. Sister literally jumps out of her chair, points at us and screams “OMG! You’re pregnant!!!!!” (Now, remember, we are in the middle of Red Robin at this point). We look at each other, his parents and back at her and smile and shake our heads “yes”, and she throws the plastic egg projectile right at the waitress walking by. Mom starts bawling uncontrollably, Dad’s face gets all red and teary, no one can talk. It was a pretty epic reaction.
Needless to say, they were thrilled.
Fast forward to our trip to visit my parents. We arrive and my mom and step-dad are out in the garden weeding or something. They wave briefly to us and we enter the house. We go out back and try to get them to come in. Being determined as they were, it took several interruptions from us and about an hour and a half for them to FINALLY come inside. (Torture!)
They finally came in and were sitting on their patio in the back and asked us to come out and sit with them, so we obliged. We were waiting for my sister and her GF to arrive (which was suppose to be about the time that it was) and then we get a phone call telling us that they were running an hour late. Plans foiled again! Oh well, we decided to just tell them separately. We hand them their eggs.
They both open the eggs. Step-dad looks it over and remarks that it’s cute. Mom looks at it like “is this it?” and shoots us a look. Step-dad finds the date and shows mom. Mom doesn’t get it. Mom states that she doesn’t get it. We giggle. She asks if it’s our wedding date. We say no. She says she doesn’t get it. Step-dad starts laughing hysterically. He tells mom to look at the color of the Peeps. We realize he has it figured out and we smile at him. Mom starts getting frustrated and says she doesn’t get it. Step-dad says “they’re having a baby”. Mom turns to us and says “seriously?” in her most sarcastic tone. We smile and shake our heads “yes”. Mom whips around and says “SHUT UP! SERIOUSLY!” and then come the tears and the “oh, my baby!” hugs. They were also thrilled.
Enter my sister and her woman, FINALLY. Second verse, same as the first.
Sister tries to eat the Peep. I have to yell at her to not eat the Peep without looking at it. they both look at it. Sister is completely confused. GF gets it almost immediately and freaks out, shaking her hands and jumping around telling sister to look at the two Peeps and the date. It dawns on my sister, and she gives me this look that says “fo rillz?” Yes. Fo Rills. She scares the crap out of me because she starts uncontrollably crying (something that would, under normal circumstances, never happen). This weird combo of crying, o=laughing and oooing and aaahing happens for about 30 minutes. Then we bust out the video of the LB and the heartbeat and everything and then it’s waterworks city. They were also thrilled. Perfect
Fast forward to My dad and step-mom. We go to breakfast. My dad is a guitarist, so we bought a personalized brass pick for him that said “Grandpa Rocks”. We thought this was pretty self explanatory. Nope. We finish eating and give him the pick. he opens it and says “oh wow, that’s cool…….but I can’t read it, it’s too small, I need my glasses”. Oh dad. How NOT rock and roll of you. My step-mom offers to read it but she can’t either so I read it to him. He shoots me a look and says “oh haha, I get it, because I’m old. Sure make jokes about your old man”. Step-mom just laughs and says “MAYBE they got it for you for a reason!?” Dad, semi-irritated asks “well did you?” I say…YES. Then we get this string of syllables: “Oh……………………….Oh….OH! Really? Oh my gosh!” shortly followed by a very manly walk to the bathroom (to wipe tears). he comes back and tells us how excited he is and how happy he is, then something weird happens. He hi five-hugs Ace and says “good job!” #thingsyourdadshouldneversayordoinfrontofyou.
They were thrilled.
Now…rewind to grandma.
We decide to tell grandma, we would show her the video/let her listen to the heartbeart. We put the soundbyte up to her ear and told her to guess what it was. Any guesses at what she said?
“Who’s washing machine is that?”
“Are those windshield wipers?”
(perfect grandma reaction)
No gram, it’s something else. Listen again. Still not getting it, my mom suggests we let her see the video. So we do. She says :
“What am I looking at?” My mom explains it’s someones stomach.
“Is that gas?”
Yes gram, it’s gas.
We all laugh and say no, listen again. She does. She says: “Is that a heartbeat? Is it a baby?”
We all shout, YES. She says : “Well who’s stomach is it?” *facepalm*
“is it yours” she says to me…YES GRAM.
“Oh. OH!” “Well that’s a surprise.” “When?”
I say “November 1”
She says “oh.” Then, gives herself whiplash as she whips her head around to glare at us and says “That was fast!” “When is the wedding?” Oh gram.
We tell her we aren’t sure yet but sometime this year.
She is semi-satiated.
3 hours later, after her complete silence….”I’m gonna be a great-grandma!” and a big smile.
Theeeeerrrreee is it. Way to process Gram. Now I know where my sister gets it.
All in all it was a fabulous, funny, and fantastic weekend filled with wonderful, heartfelt, moving and hilarious moments that we will never forget.
Little Babe…you are highly anticipated, deeply wanted and completely loved❤
It’s awesome to know that you have a huge, loving, support system…even now, when you are only the size of a blueberry.